pain

PAIN by Martin Nievera

The thoughts I have of you I treasure
The good times and the bad, we'll share forever more
Somehow, you've changed and you just didn't make it through
But I believe that one day, you'll have to know that I'm still in love with you

At times we couldn't understand each other
And though we tried we couldn't keep from fallin'
Somehow, somewhere our love had lost its way
And now I feel it's over, it's hard to say but I love you just the same

REFRAIN:
It's been so long since I had you by my side
I don't even know what to say or do
I tried so hard to get you off my mind
But I love you still try to understand
When I'm all alone...I still can feel the pain you've left behind

Thoughts I have of you I'll always treasure
The good times and the bad we'll share forever more
Somehow, somewhere our love will find a way
But I believe that one day
I'll hear you say that you love me all the way

nobody really wants pain in their lives. pain hurts, pain pinches your heart, pain lasts.

but we can look at pain differently. pain makes us stronger, it shouldn't make us weak. we can learn from pain and do whatever it is possible not to feel it further. pain lets you be human.

The song pain by martin nievera has an upbeat rhythm. it does not give out a solemn tone befitting its title. it gives us a different take on the subject. maybe the writer of the song wanted us to look into what pain can be in our lives and still be hopeful about making through it all. pain doesn't kill us. if only it reminds us that we are still alive!

pain and hope go hand-in-hand. letting you experience pain better allows you to appreciate all the small things in life. hope comes after pain.... then love comes and stays forever.

wanting to be somewhere else

the quest to live my life to the fullest, with or without her beside me, has somehow lead me back to square one. it was a fun couple of weeks going through different directions and renewing connections with long lost friends. i wanted to be the person i was around 2 years ago. i wanted to be the person who is always having fun, enjoying what life has to offer, and enjoying a diverse group of friends and their companionship. but instead of the person who lives life for today, i wanted to be the person who lives life to the fullest for today and tomorrow.

but somehow, something just didn't feel right last weekend. it was supposed to be a good weekend; a trip to subic for my officemate's wedding, then go to the christening of my best bud's first child, where i was the child's godfather, the day after.

a good friend of mine whom admittedly, i had a history with before, was with me on both events. we started to meet up again lately. it was a conscious decision for me to go out with her as i do enjoy her company a whole lot. she challenges me a lot mentally and intellectually and both of us can be as forward to one another.

however, during the night in subic, while we were sitting together and watching shows in cable tv in our rented place, i felt something different. i felt uneasy and distracted. i had to excuse myself purposedly to smoke outside. while outside, in the courtyard, sitting on a bench, i confronted my thoughts...

i missed somebody else.

there i was, in a place far away where i was supposed to enjoy my time. there i was, in the company of a wonderful girl... but my thoughts were somewhere else.

indeed you can bury thoughts of a person you have feelings for. you can mask it by dating other women. you can hide it all by being happy while with another person's company. but you can't deny the fact that all things being equal, you would still want to be with the one person you have feelings for.

and that person is somewhere far away from subic. she is not the person waiting for me in the room.

i may be in subic, but in my heart and in my thoughts i wanted to be somewhere else...